The Inside Out

Sorry for the enormous blogging hiatus …when my training got more intense for the half marathon, somehow my blogging dropped to the back burner! I am going to do my best to do better!

But since we are talking about the half marathon, I learned a couple of things about myself in the process of this training and running. The biggest of those things being this: I am a complete and utter ANTISOCIAL RUNNER. Yes, I should have learned this in the Cooper River Bridge Run when there were 45,000 people there, but it took the Nashville Country Music Half Marathon to prove it to myself. I laughed at the weather forecast that read: “Heavy thunderstorms, severe lightning, LARGE hail and tornadoes.” I wasn’t even that bothered by the 7 hour trip there and back. And I loved the Expo experience (yes, all those people were there too, but they didn’t bother me there!). When I got out on the streets (after a quick potty jaunt to Starbucks…you have no idea how glad I was that it was right beside the start line…thank you Starbucks!!) I thought that at some point the people would spread out. No chance. I felt more like I was trying to get down the football field with an entire football team in my way. I never put my headphones in because I was too afraid I wouldn’t hear someone around me (but the music on course was pretty neat).By the time I hit mile 7 I was just agitated…and I exhaled it in one huge breath when I told Scott to “Shut up” and that “I didn’t want to run with him anymore” and that “he should just go one ahead.” I felt better after I screamed at him, but that was really not very nice. No worries, I apologized at mile 10 and all is good now. Here’s my poor husband who was trying to be supportive and was already running much slower than his pace to stay with me, and I totally attacked him. He knew I wasn’t really upset with him, just uncomfortable and unable to really run.

After the race, I of course felt fantastic and accomplished and all the pumped up adrenaline you can feel after running your first half marathon in a 2:30:16, but that’s when it hit me. My running isn’t about me. My running is my time for worship and communication with God. It’s a time when what goes in my ears is worshipful adoration for a loving Father. And what comes out is my heartfelt gratitude for Him. We solve problems together on my runs. We chat like the buddies that we are. And that is where I can hear Him best…and He’s inspiring and encouraging and I have Him all to myself. And if there are thousands upon thousands of people around (WITH COWBELLS NO LESS!)…that’s going to be seriously hard to do.

I think next time I do a half marathon…yes, I said I was going to do it again…I just need to adjust my mindset about it. I need to go into it with the knowledge that that little bit of time isn’t like my normal runs, it’s about a personal accomplishment I’d like to have off my bucket list. He’s still going to be there, but it’s not going to be one of “our moments”. Like the difference in a concert with my husband, and a quiet dinner just the two of us. Then the real reality hit me when I went out for my first run after the 1/2:

On the next Monday morning,

when I go back out,

just me,

by myself,

God will be there…

and He will tell me how proud He is that I gave it my best.

Today was the half way mark in my training for the half marathon and God presented me with a 70 degree day in February! Only in SC. Apparently that made anyone and everyone show up at my favorite running spot today! The fam and I headed to Riverfront park about 2:30 with a billion other people. We couldn’t even find a parking place! Scott and the kids were going to bike ride so I took off and they planned to catch up as soon as they could.

There’e been a lot of talk about treadmill running and outdoor running lately, particularly from Runner’s World. Right when I started running, I remembered the twitter that I recently saw from Cool Running kind of asking the question: What’s the difference to you in a treadmill run vs. outdoors and why you like one or the other. And today I answered that for myself:

PEOPLE.

This isn’t a technical, logical or even scientific answer, but  that is definitely my answer! Now, I’ve been confined to the treadmill for several weeks because of the cold or finding the time to run, so I was starting to really enjoy my ‘mill. I was kickin’ out some decent runs and catching up on episodes of Lost…all was good! But today’s weather was way perfect and drew me outside for my long run! As I got started there was this girl running in front of me, going what I would call “slow” (she was probably flying but she looked like she was slow to me!). And she had next to nothing on. And was covered in tattoos. Now please don’t think I’m judging cause I’m not against tattoos at all! But these were the things that were defining the skinny mini in front of me – and she was challenging me some. So I said ok…I’ll try to pass her. At this point my ipod was blasting a little Addison Road This Could be Our Day and I’m thinking “Yeah, my day…I’m rockin’!” So about a mile or so later I pass her, then I walk and she passes me, then I realize she’s wearing makeup and dangling earrings and I’m even more motivated to top this person I’ve never even met…and I pass her again. She’s probably the nicest, best friend, spreading the love of Jesus to the world and feeding starving people girl around…but today she was my nemesis. Then Man-who-Runs-So-Fast-I-Look-Like-I’m-Standing-Still passes me. Ugh. So, Riverfront ends at the clever little dam that creates a beautiful waterfall and since I’m ahead of Girl-Who-Runs-With-Tats. All is good. I ran the little bridge at the end and started my turn around to head back and I realize…she turned early. That’s cheating! She didn’t even go to the end of the trail! Oh no she didn’t! And now, we’re running. Christy Nockels is egging me on with Let My Life Light Up and I’m on fire! Fire I tell you! And U2 tells me the Streets Have No Name (I’m secretly wishing it had been Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For to keep me going but I’m just lettin’ it play!). But my perspective gets a little changed. I start noticing the kids and the puppies on the path today, the bikes and the birds. Then I pass Kid-With-Too-Much-Static-in-His-Hair and giggle a bit. Then I see my family and my baby boy who is riding his two wheel bike like the big boy he is, and he’s smiling at me. Huge smile. Yes it’s only mile 4 but I’m feeling much better! After a little family love I follow them out. And I pass the bridge that the homeless people live under. And all their stuff that’s usually there is gone. Perspective change #2. What a silly thing I am to be worrying about some girl when there are people with no homes, no nothing, right next to where I am. And Steve Fee reminds me, Glory to God Forever.

People surround you when you run outside, and they have the ability to effect your run – good or bad, but that’s up to you. So I ran the longest I ever have before today. 6 miles. In an hour and 6 minutes. Not bad for a girl who’s only been training for 2 months! But I owe a thanks to the pretty girl who made me work for it today. Hope you finished well today, Girl-Who-Kept-Me-Going. Thanks.

Background:

I despise the color pink. For the first year of my daughters life she only wore purple and yellow…actually, lots of yellow. I actually requested that people not give her pink things at our baby showers. I never wore pink growing up. NEVER. Ask my mother…it drove her nuts. But seriously, it has always been a color I avoided…like the plague that it is.

So why all of a sudden have I realized it is slowly seeping into my world?

Once Sarah could choose, before she even should have been able to, it has always been pink. It is the color of her destiny! And I did finally repaint her room in HER color last summer. But now all of a sudden it’s not just Princess Sarah. It’s everywhere. I wore a pink dress to my husband’s class reunion (his 30th reunion…I was the only 30 year old there!). And I did it by choice! I recently noticed I run in my pink shirt more than my other ones (I didn’t buy it…Scott did) and my favorite hair tie to run in is PINK! It came in a package of a bunch, and now it’s the only one left that will keep the wisps and layers out of my face (grow bangs grow!). I was already noticing all this when I chose my blog theme, and once again pink showed up! I thought, “But I do actually like it!”

Then I made my running actually have a goal, and signed up for the Cooper River Bridge Run and plan to try for the Country Music Half Marathon. So, of course, I needed a new pair of shoes. You know, the ones that are going take me all the way! The Mizuno Wave Inspires are my absolute favorites (my originals were yellow…and perfect…and I wore them slap out!), so off to the store I went to find some. I thought for a second there weren’t going to be any in my size in Columbia (apparently all female runners are a 7 around here!). But Scott called and found one pair in a shoe store at the mall. I walked in, thrilled to be running on air in just a few short hours! This was what I saw:

Very Funny.

Hope these GLOWING PINKSTERS can fly.